I hate second guessing myself. Apparently im really bad at those, like for example in mcq my first answer would probably be the right one since my second answer is definitely wrong no matter if the first one is right or not.
Second guesses made me question myself. Was i wronf in thinking that way? Unease, awkward even in my own skin. I dont like that. Its hard to let people who hurt you back in.
Politeness and hypocrisy is after all, just divided by a line.
On the other hand, i had another dream. And in ny dream, i can swim. Out of frustration, anger, and mixed emotions i swam!!! I can still remember feeling so amazed in my dream that i can swim and i think i swam 18472847171 laps. The stupid girl said "wah even in your dream you never forgot your innate inability to swim" cause i told her occasionally i still feel suffocated and terror at drowning. Lol its not innate unability ok. I should be able to swim if the bro didnt try to drown me when i was young.
But i feel relieved, when the dream ended. It was like the end which again the stupid girl thinks otherwise. "The beginning", she says. We'll see.
It's a wonder how much our subconscious reveals our thoughts. The deepest abyss of our raw honest thoughts.
The week has been good with people i enjoy being with mostly. Filling up my time with outings because i will definitely miss that. Being able to go just for the sake of going out cos i hate having nothing to do.
Feels like im being judged again but who cares.. LOL i should get used to it since i will always be so. Because those who love will always understand. And those who know will always believe.
"It takes something special for you to be yourself in front of people. Some are born loving me, some because they are worth it so i shared, but some do so without. Those are the people i should cherish."
Thankful for those who looked right at me, and thank you for loving me. With all my flaws and annoyance and whatsoever.
Today i was watching my drama again, and it mentioned about lightyears. So it got me thinking again, time=distance?? I used to think time travelling was possible because when we travel from one country to another, we are moving in time, be it back or forward. How cool would that be.
