Oh god, there goes two days of mugging. Just ended the first paper of sem 2 exam. And you know what? It suck. It's never about failing. I didnt even want to get a B.

Damn, went into the exam hall with, I'm gonna rock this thing. And came out TT.

Actually the paper was okay, but no A. That's for sure. Next paper on thurs, Math. As much as i hate math cause it's so boring and standard, Math's kind to me. Or rather, my brain likes math. ._. But the paper is so late and clashes with bro's bookout time. Argh. This exam sucks.

Anyway, went to have late lunch with mates after paper. Chatted about everything under the Sun. Was on the topic of Uni for a while. I still don't know what I want though. What's there for me, and what am i good at etc. I'm going the same path as i were during Secondary school days, getting better results, so i can have more choices. But i'm so used to doing my best when it matters the most. ._. Poly style's really killing me. I dont even bloody remember what i studied yesterday, not to mention the past few weeks.


I dont have an Aim! :( What should i be next time? There seemed to be a thousands over types of jobs, and none seemed to be for me. Seriously.

Writer, artist, Accountant. Boring, hard life, and i cant draw shit to save my life.

So frustrated over this. I cant seem to decide on a job. How nice if we could try everything. But then there's the matter of time and money. Restrictions. -.-

If a job have no restrictions, is fun and exciting, i'll sure take it up. But then there's the practical side of me saying it must pay well, if not i cant support my family. But maybe i don't. Not until my dad stops his business, at least. Ah, i still have 2 years left, why am i thinking so much about it now?

Note to self: Pose question to self on 21/2/2012.

PS: Imma try more jobs for now! :)

Sometimes i hate it when i know that there's people reading this. I have alot of stuff i need to get it out, but i couldn't spill it here. And it's killing me inside.





I dont like it when a person thinks of giving up so easily. Whatever happened to determination? Life's hard, yeah. Who doesn't feel that? But perserverance is the key.

But what actually happen, when you snap?

Happy valentine's people! :) Esp to those single ones out there. Though today's just another normal day. Hehe. But actually valentine's seemed to be pointless. There's a song from fish, it's kinda goes like, Everyday's valentines, when i'm with you. And it's true in the sense that when you're with someone that you love, everyday can be as sweet as valentines. And i dont get why guys could be esp sweet on V day, then inconsiderate on others. Thought should be sweet on everyday what! Whatever happened to consistency?!

But to some, it might be a day when you die also must get a free day, or at least half a day, to accompany your girl/boy friend, or spouse or whatever. Cos it's valentine's.

Waiting for White Valentine's! :)


Today phleb test was okay, did in 15 minutes? apart from that, presentation was okay too i guess.

Told mama to book somewhere for holidays after 6th of april. Need to get away, before i start year 2, and 2 ITP. life will suck then. Cant wait for chalet.

I actually have loads of things to do! But i have to note down what i had to remember for this week. Pretty good week. Dont feel like spoiling it. Except for the fact that bro went into army. And contributed to the nice things cos i get to go tekong and explore! heh! Went Chloe's house today. Went for some social night thingy yesterday night. Turned out to be pretty good, cause made a few new friends. Funny how some people seemed to click, and others cant ever get along. But i'm not bothering myself to make things work with them. Right. Now gotta finish my RWP report, PBL AND MICROBIOLOGY.

It'd be good if someone can actually kill me, right now in fact.

Omo, the long break is over. Ironically, I feel even more drained. But this is one helluva CNY to remember. I tend to forget things when i'm enjoying myself fully. Ah, but i'm so tired now so my brain's not functioning properly. All i know is i have a mountain load of stuff to do, yet all i want to do is to sleep and be oblivious to everything.

Seems like once night falls, i'll start feeling differently. Was home on Chu 3 night, after bainian, and i watched MBC. Suddenly it feels as if i'm wasting my life and was feeling so bloody suffocated. It was like a cage, forbidding me to do the stuff i want. Yet i dont know what do i want. I　just want to be out freely and wandering with no cares. But who doesn't?

The feeling came back today during IOC, when i saw a bird flying past, around in circles.

Ah, i really do need to get a start on work.

Suck, i love the weather now, it's awesome cos i get to wear my fav long sleeved sweater out and wont be sweating or cursing the heat. BUT I SERIOUSLY HATED WHAT I AM DOING FOR THE PAST FEW HOURS.

What the shit seriously. It's not so much of the ironing, though i really hate iron clothes, cos it gets frustrating when you have to iron the same patch again and again and AGAIN if it doesn't dry. AND, the best part is, i am doing it alone. WTF.

Hi, i'm your kid, and i'm studying. Yet you're like going to do your hair, AND leaving sg for holidays tomorrow. Said you're coming back early to iron and wash clothes. But how is coming home at 7 in the evening, early, and leaving me with all the work. I bet you're actually happy that i skipped school today. No wonder you didn't wake me up when you left this morning, cause you knew i wouldn't let you. F.

I did all the stuff thinking i could go out and enjoy with my friends tomorrow, yet got pulled back to mop the floor tomorrow. Sometimes i really do wonder if i'm the mum or you are. Cos i don't see other mums doing stuff like that, and i don't see other mums enjoying life like you do.

It's almost as if i have to be the kid and the mum, and is expected to let you enjoy a better life next time. Sorry, but i don't think i can. You're having a life that's beyond me already. Unless i became the next president, i dont really see how you can enjoy a better life next time.

I'm so irritated that i'm doing all the work, and some just spend the whole day slouching at the sofa, and another out whole day doing god knows what. I wouldn't mind it that much if everyone's working just as hard. It's lunar new year, i know. And it's once in a year too, so why can't all of us do it together. Just because YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO, OR MY BACK ACHES, you get away scot free. So i should claim that my legs aches, shouldn't i? Right, but i don't think you would even care. I used that once didn't i?

Sometimes life is that unfair, and it just annoys the hell outta me. All of us know how to enjoy life, yet when there's work to do, only a few's left. Screw the responsible kid in me, take off when there's work to do. Or better still, be born a bloody guy so i could claim I DONT KNOW HOW. LIKE A WIMP.

Argh.

And what contributed to my already boiling temper is watching Minho and Eunseo on oms. Hmpf. Shan't say it cos i didn't wanna be reminded of it. But if he likes her, then what can i do huh!! She must have something that he's attracted to! Even though she's alil' older, ahh whatever. He's a noona killer!